The John Kerry Comedy Club

Little Johnny Heinz-Kerry came out to play at the NY Times, and was so kind and thoughtful as to give President Bush his plan for Iraq - you remember - the one he didn't have at the last election? So far I've refrained from Fisking here, but this one I can't resist.

"the Bush administration's choices have made Iraq into what it wasn't before the war - a breeding ground for jihadists."

Jihadists my ass - before the war Iraq was a training ground for terrorists - now they have to train in Saudi Arabia.

"Our mission in Iraq is harder because the administration ignored the advice of others, went in largely alone, underestimated the likelihood and power of the insurgency, sent in too few troops to secure the country, destroyed the Iraqi army through de-Baathification, failed to secure ammunition dumps, refused to recognize the urgency of training Iraqi security forces and did no postwar planning. A little humility would go a long way - coupled with a strategy to succeed."

Well, that pretty much covers every aspect of the war, don't it, chief? It's a real shame you didn't get elected, so you could have put your "PLAN" into effect - released Saddam, dusted him off, kissed his ass and sold out the people of Iraq the way you sold out every one of the American servicemen that served in Viet Nam.

"The president must also announce immediately that the United States will not have a permanent military presence in Iraq. Erasing suspicions that the occupation is indefinite is critical to eroding support for the insurgency."

Announce that we won't have a "permanent military presence"? So, we won't have an Embassy there? (Marine Security Guards, Defence Attache). We won't ever want to have an air base there? Stop it, Kerry - you're killin' me!

"He also needs to put the training of Iraqi troops on a true six-month wartime footing and ensure that the Iraqi government has the budget needed to deploy them."

Just where is that budget supposed to come from, Johnnie boy? Is Teresa gonna pop for it? Last I looked, the UN had Iraq's money and they were spending it faster than a Democrat in a whorehouse - on anything and everything BUT Iraq.

He goes on and on (and on and on and ...) but I couldn't take any more without getting diced carrots and tomato skins in my keyboard. If you really need to read John F'kin Kerry's lack of a Master Plan, go search the New York Grimes.